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Why Glenn Beck Ought to Be Repeatedly Cock-Punched (Yes, Even in the Hospital)
Friday, November 06, 2009
By Rude One
The Rude Pundit
Now that Glenn Beck's internal organs have decided, like a Michele Bachmann staff member, "Get me the fuck away from this crazy fucker" and rebelled against their host body, it is perhaps a good time to beat him while he's down.
On his radio show yesterday, before his appendix went rogue on the rest of his abdomen, Beck offered a simple excuse as to why conservative Doug Hoffman lost to Democrat Bill Owens in the NY-23 congressional race: Hoffman's a poin. Beck said, "He is not electric at all...I like him, but he is not, he's not flashy. He's an accountant eight weeks ago that nobody even knew, a complete unknown." And then Beck repeats this over and over, that Hoffman is an accountant who was "double-teamed" by Owens and Republican drop-out Dede Scozzafava.
To be fair, Beck never assumed Hoffman was going to win. On his TV show on Tuesday, he said, "Hoffman wins or loses, it doesn't matter." Because he sees that accountant who couldn't answer a question about local issues as a harbinger of things to come. "If the political parties don't hold themselves accountable, don't stop the out-of-control spending, those who love me, those who hate me, those who love Sarah Palin, and quite frankly, those who would like to put her in a cave with a really hungry grizzly bear will vote all of you out," he offered.
His erotic ursine fantasies about Palin aside, there comes a point when you actually break down how a Beck rant progresses where you realize that not only does he not know where he's going, he doesn't give a flying fuck. Because earlier, in that same rant, he said, "I mean, I really don't care about local politics all that much." And, since Hoffman took after the man he called his "mentor," it's another reason Hoffman lost. Not because Bill Owens brought the non-accountant thunder and excitement, but because he actually gave a shit about the district. (And, you know, lived there.)
But none of this matters to Beck. He says as much. All that matters is the imposition of his deranged 9/12er ideology, a political philosophy that's closer to anarchy than Emma Goldman could have ever dreamed. Beck doesn't even give a fuck if he knows who is running. From his radio show, regarding the New York City mayoral race: "Sarah, what's the name of the guy that [Bloomberg] was running against? Do you even know?" When he's told it's Bill Thompson, he responds in what might be a racist dig, "I thought it was Robinson. I had no idea." On Tuesday, on his TV show, he sputtered, "Christie -- what's his face -- running for governor there in New Jersey."...(Remainder.)
On his radio show yesterday, before his appendix went rogue on the rest of his abdomen, Beck offered a simple excuse as to why conservative Doug Hoffman lost to Democrat Bill Owens in the NY-23 congressional race: Hoffman's a poin. Beck said, "He is not electric at all...I like him, but he is not, he's not flashy. He's an accountant eight weeks ago that nobody even knew, a complete unknown." And then Beck repeats this over and over, that Hoffman is an accountant who was "double-teamed" by Owens and Republican drop-out Dede Scozzafava.
To be fair, Beck never assumed Hoffman was going to win. On his TV show on Tuesday, he said, "Hoffman wins or loses, it doesn't matter." Because he sees that accountant who couldn't answer a question about local issues as a harbinger of things to come. "If the political parties don't hold themselves accountable, don't stop the out-of-control spending, those who love me, those who hate me, those who love Sarah Palin, and quite frankly, those who would like to put her in a cave with a really hungry grizzly bear will vote all of you out," he offered.
His erotic ursine fantasies about Palin aside, there comes a point when you actually break down how a Beck rant progresses where you realize that not only does he not know where he's going, he doesn't give a flying fuck. Because earlier, in that same rant, he said, "I mean, I really don't care about local politics all that much." And, since Hoffman took after the man he called his "mentor," it's another reason Hoffman lost. Not because Bill Owens brought the non-accountant thunder and excitement, but because he actually gave a shit about the district. (And, you know, lived there.)
But none of this matters to Beck. He says as much. All that matters is the imposition of his deranged 9/12er ideology, a political philosophy that's closer to anarchy than Emma Goldman could have ever dreamed. Beck doesn't even give a fuck if he knows who is running. From his radio show, regarding the New York City mayoral race: "Sarah, what's the name of the guy that [Bloomberg] was running against? Do you even know?" When he's told it's Bill Thompson, he responds in what might be a racist dig, "I thought it was Robinson. I had no idea." On Tuesday, on his TV show, he sputtered, "Christie -- what's his face -- running for governor there in New Jersey."...(Remainder.)
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