Tom Ridge Wants to Keep You Secure
Friday, August 21, 2009
By Rude One
The Rude Pundit
When the wooden horse was being delivered, all the Trojans were exultant, save one: "Cassandra cried, and curs'd th' unhappy hour;/ Foretold our fate; but, by the god's decree,/ All heard, and none believ'd the prophecy." Oh, how Cassandra must have suffered. Imagine: she could see it all, the deaths of everyone, even herself, but because she refused to fuck Apollo, she was damned with the gift of prophecy, of being right but never being heeded. Think about that hell for a moment. Think about seeing the destruction of your city before it happens and then having to live through the actuality of it. Think about telling everyone you love that it is going to happen and then being ignored. All because a simpering god didn't get his rocks off. Eventually, Cassandra got used to it, though. By the end of her life, she merely accepted her fate.
As one of the millions of Cassandras in this America during the Bush administration, the Rude Pundit's initial reaction to the revelation by Tom "Duct and Cover" Ridge that when he was the first Grand Poobah of Homeland Security, the Bush White House wanted him to raise the terrorist threat level as the 2004 election approached was an eye roll. More or less, it was, "Oh, really? Who would've thought that? That's right. Everybody." And as usual when some former Bush official comes clean, he felt the bile poison his throat as he thought, "Thanks, cocksucker, for waiting. Now go back to sucking cock, you scabby-kneed whore."
That's far from hyperbole, because unlike, say, Paul O'Neill and Scott McLellan, who confessed for big advances and their souls, Tom Ridge's book is not really a tell-all. Oh, no, it's merely part of a larger manifesto, The Test of Our Times: America Under Siege...and How We Can Be Safe Again, a book that presumes to scare the fuck out of us so that corporations and governments and even your college campus can hire firms like, oh, hey, Ridge Global, whose President and CEO is...oh, you fucking know already....(Remainder.)
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